I would say our marriage has become a little lackluster lately. Not necessarily intentionally. I think we just fell into the rut of experiencing minimum change in our lives, feeling drained by daily occurrences, the drudgery of the winter, and falling into the comparison game with other happy couples or fellow travelers in this journey we call “life”. Everyone seemed to be continuing forward movement while we remained… stuck.
For years I’ve worn my busyness as a badge of honor, and at other times, a cross to bear. I was a self-appointed martyr – Ooooh, how I wish I could spend time with you, but woe to me, I have way too much work on my plate to take time out of my schedule for a short conversation with you.
As I sit here now, I consider the reasons I have kept myself so busy. I can name three.
According to Psychologist, Dr. Kevin Leman, your lifestyle has nothing to do with the car you drive and everything to do with your perception of when you count in life.
Your lifestyle is the pattern you establish throughout your life of how you respond to people and situations around you, what assumptions you make about yourself and your environment, and when your emotions kick in involuntarily. Consider the below sentences again: (If you missed Tuesdays post, click here to catch up first). Continue Reading…
I recently interviewed a woman about what she liked about her newly acquired position at a company.
A trending topic in my life is the concept of Perspective. We each view the world through our own pair of lenses that can be colored by our personality styles, experiences growing up and even our moods in that exact moment. When you toss familial and societal expectations into the mix, things can get dicey, really fast.
Imagine two individuals – each wearing an incredibly different pair of lenses – trying to communicate on one topic. Individual One thinks it is absolutely imperative to the proper function of the entire world that the main bathroom in the home gets cleaned once per week. Individual Two thinks that is ridiculous and naive. To Individual Two, it is far more important to spend that time engaging with others and developing relationships. To that person, nothing matters more and cleaning crusted poo off a toilet seat is a complete waste of time.
So, who’s right?
Happy Valentine’s Day! Okay, so I know I said you’d have to wait until next week to hear from Joe’s point of view on sex and intimacy in marriage, but I just couldn’t wait! Here, Joy’s husband Joe tells all.
It occurred to me, as we sat cross-legged on his bed reading Song of Solomon, that it probably wasn’t the smartest thing we’d done all day. We were 21, hormonally charged, in literal need of physical restraint, and counting down the days to our wedding day. Okay fine, wedding night.
Warning! If you have a weak stomach, I do not recommend clicking on this link. That, or if you get squeamish about bodily functions…
Crap! No. “Mmmm… you said something about what you are doing after work tonight…?” My tone turns upward as I end my statement with a question.
I don’t pay attention.
I often read the same sentence in a paragraph 4x times before I realize that I’ve read it 4x. Then I say to myself, “Okay, this time, you are going to focus”. It doesn’t happen. When I leave the house for work, I often times have to go back inside, run allll the way upstairs to check to make sure I’ve unplugged my flat iron. Once I get outside to the car, I’ll sometimes go back to the door 3x to make sure I’ve locked it.